Trademarks Dick Cheney borrowed from Halliburton

SNIPER
Perforating system comprised of a hunting rifle with explosive charges to perforate annoying hunting buddies.

EVADER
Oversight rules evasion services, namely ensuring excessive mishandling of classified materials by the executive branch.

STONE BREAKER
Character assassination equipment, namely, ball-busting, verbal attacks against political opponents.

GEO-PILOT
Tool used in screwing the country, namely, used for steering George W. Bush in critical policy decisions.

ILLUSION
Power tools for the creation of imaginary threats and weapons of mass destruction for the purpose of generating fear and gaining political power.

QUICKRIG
Voting machines, namely, units rigged to undercount opposing party votes, for use in stealing national political elections.

TSUNAMI
Weather control services, namely, using natural disasters to improve US foreign relations and provide distraction from domestic problems and scandals.

KEN TROL
Chemical additive allowing for control over national energy policy, namely, via influence over Ken Lay and Enron.

MAXFORCE
Explosive charges allowing for maximum deployment of soldiers in order to accomplish economic and political objectives.

HOLEPLUG
Information blocking services, namely, for sealing and plugging information leaks about lesbian family members to the media.

EXITRITE
Multilateral Iraq war completion equipment, namely, large “Mission Accomplished” banner. (trademark abandoned: May 31, 2005)